The end of a journey....

Today marked the last day of Tristan's journey at the Washtenaw Community College Childcare Center. It was bittersweet today as I signed him in and then left the building to head over to my class. As I left the classroom I tried to hold back he tears remembering the very first day I took him to his class in the red room, and then his transition into the gold room. It seems so long ago, but it was only in 2007, two short years ago. I know without that program it would have been impossible for me to finish school this quickly. I still have one more semester left but I figured I would do my last class in the Fall, an internship, but just so I could focus on that class alone.

So this day at the end of my journey with Tristan and all the mornings I had to fight with him so we could get to class on time. I have fought endless fights with him so I could actually leave him in class without a fit. Fight with him so we could go home. Today was like every other day, he did not want to go to school, then when I showed up to take him home, I had to search for him under something. I sat with him as he ate his lunch then we said our tearful goodbyes, well my tearful goodbyes anyhow. Then like we did everyday for the past year and a half I had to let him shoot baskets in the gym before we left. I always told him you can do it four times (there are four baskets to shoot into). When we first started the gold room he could not reach the fourth basket and today he shot the fourth one just like it was the other three baskets.

I wish I could freeze time some days and today it was shown to me how fast my babies have grown up. I know our journey is not over quite yet but that part is over for me. No more preschooler and our next stop is kindergarten, before I know it he will be graduating school. It seems like just yesterday we welcomed Tristan into our lives and now he is just woven himself into our hearts that life seems impossible to imagine before him. Next year when he gets on the bus for kindergarten, which coincidentally is the same year Trevor heads off to high school, I am going to be an emotional basket case. I am going to remember how excited he is and cherish the season of my life for what it is. We all want our children to be independent and happy, that is the step he is taking going off to school without me.



I read this poem by Cindy Zelinski years ago and it pretty much sums up how I felt today as we left the Childcare Center for the last time. The poem is called A Touch of Love.

A TOUCH OF LOVE

You were six months old and full of fun,
With a blink of my eye, you were suddenly one.
There were so many things we were going to do,
But I turned my head and you turned two.
At two you were very dependant on me,
But independence took over when you turned three.
Your third birthday, another year I tried to ignore,
But when I lit the candles, there weren’t three, but four.
Four was the year that you really strived,
Why, look at you now, you’re already five.
Now you are ready for books and for rules.
This is the year that you go to school.
The big day came, you were anxious to go.
We walked to the bus, going oh, so slow.
As you climbed aboard and waved good-bye,
I felt a lump in my throat and tears stung my eyes.
Time goes so fast, it’s hard to believe
That just yesterday you were home here with me.
And tomorrow when the bus brings you home
and you jump to the ground,
You’ll be wearing your cap and graduation gown.
So I’m holding to these moments as hard as I can,
Because the next time I look, I’ll be seeing a man.

~Cindy Zelinski